Dora Jolene

The Imposter Part 2

Here’s a question that was posed to me after publishing The Imposter:


What had you write “The Imposter”? Does it really matter what they say?


“The Imposter” blog came as I considered all the different voices and expectations
I’d been listening to through the years. Helpful and non-helpful. The ones that
inspired me, that coached me, that challenged me… and the ones that stuck on
me like bubble gum to a shoe on hot asphalt. With exploration, one of those
voices that stuck with me was that which I describe in The Imposter. It felt like a
gut punch to me.

On the path we call life, we all have moments when we are less confident or less
sure of ourselves. In those moments, we get to decide what (and who) we listen
to. And for how long. The voices can be subtle or loud. And they can come from
someone who is well meaning and really, really cares for us. Unfortunately, with
time, we tend to hear them as white noise. They blend into the background,
chiming in when really not needed.

What happened for me, was that I made friends with that particular imposter.
What happens when we do that?! I would say… they disappear. Possibly, they
allow the habits created through the voice of the imposter to become gifts and
wisdom.

Through that particular imposter voice, I created work habits that got things done
behind the scenes. Once I had all the information needed, you could count on me
(and my team) to create and implement the systems and projects efficiently and
on point.


With the decision I made about top producers… well, I learned so much about
them, that I can honestly say, I understand and admire the entrepreneur, real
estate agent or broker, the small business owner and the visionary that is
reaching high! I understand, and witnessed, what it took to stay in business
through the years; to persevere in dire dark times; and be generous in growing
times. I get it. I was one of those who persevered. Not all professional coaches and          consultants  get it. I do. And I meet my clients where they are. Because I’ve been on that           path.

And “never let them see me cry.” Well, there was crying. Crying on the inside or
behind the scenes. As an owner of a company, I knew the importance of my own
mindset, and what my people would see on a day to day basis. Yes, there were
times that they saw my vulnerability. Yes, there were times when they saw me
cry. But what they also saw, was how I turned my vulnerability into strength.
Authenticity into relationships. My frustration into change and movement. I
believe I earned respect in the process. And I bring all of that learning and
wisdom to my current and future clients.

So, while the imposter voice may not seem like a positive, we can quietly expose
the voices and determine who and what we take with us. That is what I believe is
the positive. Using the voice to move forward to achieve our goals and vision.
I will always be grateful for those moments that poke at my imposter. And
knowing that many of us (validated by responses to the blog) have some of those.
I just felt it was time for me personally and professionally to acknowledge that we
are all just doing the best we can at the moment.